Sunday, June 29, 2008

D-221: Hadj Politico

An Army 1LT who I work with, and who is becoming one of my buddies here, went to the Hadji shop today to pick up some VIP bars and overheard Hadj preaching to some Private about how George Bush doesn’t want him to have electricity.

This is the same Hadj that I buy my smokes from, the same Hadj who wants to have sex with Shakira, so I’m not mad at him. I’m sure he’s just regurgitating some shit that he heard, and the whole event was pretty unremarkable except that it led to a pretty spirited discussion in the office about the real reason that poor Hadj has no electricity and no air conditioning in the brutal 119⁰F Iraqi summer. In case you are wondering, the reason they have no electricity is because they can’t properly maintain their generators, that we gave them; they are constantly fucking with the power lines do siphon off more juice, consequently crashing the grid, and leaving low-hanging wires for trucks to drive into and tear apart; and the fact that the Iraqi government has yet to even break ground on a power plant despite reporting a $5 Billion surplus for the last fiscal year.

Anyhow, here are some highlights from that conversation:

MAJ: “These people haven’t done shit since inventing the zero.”

LT: “If only sitting on your ass with no shoes on produced electricity, these fucking guys could power the world.”

LT: “The whole thing is just God’s great jokes; I’m going to give you oil, and you are going to want that shit, but I’m putting it all in hell. And I’m going to fill the whole place up with the craziest fucking people you’ll ever meet; people who will literally kill their own baby just to blow out the tire on your truck.”

Quote of the Day: Army MAJ

“These people haven’t done shit since inventing the zero.”

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