Thursday, July 24, 2008

D-196: Not Just Stupid; Army Stupid

Some idiot lost a pair of Night Vision Goggles (NVGs) this week, prompting the CO to put the entire Battalion on “lock-down” until they are recovered. The idea of being on “lock-down,” when your life is contained within two square miles of sand and rocks, seems laughable, but in fact it is not, as the gym and the PX are now off limits.

I could care less about the PX, as it consists mostly of empty shelves and two months old magazines. My family fulfills my every need with a non-stop flow of generous care packages, but the gym is a tough one. I have been going to the gym six times a week since I got here, and have finally achieved the physical and mental state where I actually enjoy my time spent at the gym, rather than look on it as a miserable chore that is just an effort to fight off fatness; the counter-punch to my love of ice cream, pie, and cigarettes.

Looking around at the preponderance of very fat and lazy soldiers here, the idea of taking away PT as a means of punishing is ludicrous (not to be confused with Supah Sugah Cris, sorry; I just love that Ludicris). The only people being punished are those trying to do the right thing and stay fit, and since smoke sessions are still a perfectly acceptable punishment for misbehavior, rules forcing PT and banning PT are simultaneously in place; A universe collapsing paradigm that brings “Army Stupid” to a record plateau.

1 comment:

Sandy Salt said...

Typical of the "Army Stupid" I mean "Army Strong" mentality. Some jack@$$ puts something down and some other sneaky prick takes it because stealing is the Army way. The NVG's will show up in someone's office or vehicle, once the offending party realize they don't want to get caught with the goods. The Army takes pride in its ability to steal.

Good luck waiting this one out, but it will end. Keep the stories coming.